Posachedwapa ndinakumana ndi chibwenzi chatsopano—ndipo ndiye woti ndifanane naye kwambiri kuposa kale lonse. Ndife kale ngati mabwenzi apamtima. Tikuwoneka kuti tikuganiza zomwezo, ndipo timagwirizana kwathunthu pazikhalidwe; timaseka mosalekeza. Ndine wokondwa kuti ndamupeza. Koma posachedwapa tinayamba kugonana, ndipo…Chabwino, ichi ndi chiyambi choipa kwambiri cha kugonana chomwe ndinayamba ndakhala nacho. Akuwoneka kuti sakunyamula zizindikiro zanga pabedi. Sali wamkulu pakamwa, zomwe ndizofunikira kwambiri kwa ine. Ndipo ndikumva ngati kufuna kwanga kukhala wapamtima kukungotha. Ngakhale kuti uyu ndi munthu amene ndimamuona kukhala naye kosatha, ndimaona kuti ndine wothedwa nzeru. Kodi tingakhale bwanji patsamba lomwelo pano? Kapena kodi izi zidzalephera, chifukwa sitigwirizana pakugonana?
Chimodzi mwazinthu zomwe ndimazikonda kwambiri za sayansi yaubwenzi mzaka zingapo zapitazi zimatengera nkhaniyi. Malinga ndi kafukufukuyu, Ofufuza a Toronto adatsimikiza anthu adagwa m'misasa iwiri. Gulu lina linali ndi zikhulupiriro zakugonana, kutanthauza kuti kukhala ndi chemistry yayikulu pakati pamasamba nthawi yomweyo chinali chizindikiro cha ubale wabwino kwambiri. Gulu lina linali ndi zikhulupiriro za kukula kwa kugonana, chifukwa amakhulupirira kuti kugonana kwabwino ndi chinenero chotukuka pakati pa okondedwa. Aka, zimatengera ntchito.
Omwe ali ndi zikhulupiliro za kukula kwa kugonana, omwe amakhulupirira kuti chemistry yabwino idapezedwa kudzera mukulankhulana ndi kuchita, amakonda kukhala ndi maubwenzi abwino komanso moyo wogonana wotentha.
Phunziro ndi ili: Kugonana kotentha sikutanthauza kudziwa nthawi yomweyo zomwe zimachotsa wokondedwa wanu. Kugonana kwakukulu ndikukhala ndi malingaliro omasuka, kumvetsera ndemanga ndi kufuna kuti mugwirizane ndi zilakolako za kugonana za mnzanuyo.
Kubetcha kwanga ndikuti bwenzi lanu lodabwitsa lingakonde kukula ndi inu ndikupangitsani kukhala osangalala komanso osangalala ndi moyo wanu wogonana. Nazi zomwe mungachite kuti mumutsogolere ku zimenezo ... mofatsa.
Malangizo kwa mkati mwa chipinda chogona.
Anthu ambiri, makamaka akazi (omwe amaphunzitsidwa kukhala odekha pankhani ya kugonana), sadziŵika bwino za zimene amafuna pogona—ngakhale mukuganiza kuti mukunena mosapita m’mbali. Khalani olankhula kwambiri pa zomwe mumakonda, ndipo musalimbikitse zomwe simukuzikonda - izi zikutanthauza kuti, OSATI ZABWINO ZABWINO KWAMBIRI. Zingawoneke ngati zoyenera kuchita panthawiyi, koma ndakumana ndi amayi omwe adalowa m'kati mwa nthawi yayitali yonyenga, kunama komanso kukhumudwa kugonana. Khalani owona mtima pamene akumenya zolemba zonse zoyenera.
Apo ayi, musachite mantha. M'malo mwake, pumulani -tseka maso anu, ngakhale - ndikuwongolera sitimayi ya choo choo. Sungani manja ake pomwe mukufuna kuti akhale. Pakamwa, perekani malingaliro okhudza liwiro, kuthamanga, kukhudza. Mukudziwa zomwe zidakugwirirani ntchito m'mbuyomu, sichoncho? Linganizani sitiroko. Ndimakonda mukapita pang'onopang'ono ndipo kupanikizika kumakhala kolimba. Khalani achindunji. Ngati atenga chitsogozo chanu payekha, mwina ndi nthawi yosunthira zokambiranazi kunja kwa chipinda chogona.
Malangizo kwa kunja kwa chipinda chogona.
Ndikofunikira kwambiri kuti abwenzi akambirane za moyo wawo wakugonana kunja kwa chipinda chogona. Aliyense amachita bwino akakhala ndi mayankho omveka bwino, achindunji-koma panthawi yogonana kapena mukangotha kumene ndi nthawi yovuta. Ndibwino kuti musanene chilichonse chomwe chingasokonezedwe chifukwa sindiri mu izo, mukadali maliseche. Chifukwa chake, sungani ndemanga zowongoka pakanthawi kochepa pa chakudya chamadzulo kunyumba (kapena china chonga icho).
Nthawi ikakwana, tsatirani. Ingonenani, Wokondedwa, ndikufuna kuwonjezera pakamwa nthawi ina tikamagonana. Kodi tingayeserenso kukakamiza kwa lilime komanso kukwapula kwafupipafupi nthawi ina? Nthawi zonse mukamachita izi, zimandikhumudwitsa. Kapena ngati mukuganiza kuti mukufunikiradi kuwonetseratu kowonjezereka, nenani, Nthawi ina tikadzagonana, ndikubetcha kuti ndichoka mwachangu ngati tikulitsa chiwonetserochi. Tizisewera mozungulira; ndidabweni. Komanso, musaiwale kufunsa, Kodi mukufuna kuti ndichite chiyani? Ine ndikufuna kuchita ndendende zimenezo. Kenako tsinzini, kapena kumwetulirani ndi cheekily. Izi ziyenera kukhala zosangalatsa.
Kukambitsirana zakugonana kungakhale koyambilira kosangalatsa kwa mgwirizano weniweni. Yesetsani kuti musatsimikize kuti simunakonzekere njira zanu; zomwe mukukumana nazo ndizabwinobwino. Moyo wabwino wogonana ndi wongolimbikitsa kuchitapo kanthu. Chifukwa chake… dziperekeni kuyika ntchitoyo mmenemo.
Jenna Birch ndi wolemba Kusiyana kwa Chikondi: Dongosolo Lachikulu Lopambana M'moyo ndi Chikondi , kalozera wa zibwenzi ndi kumanga ubale kwa amayi amakono. Kuti mumufunse funso, lomwe angayankhe mugawo lomwe likubwera laPampereDpeopleny, tumizani imelo ku. jen.birch@sbcglobal.net .
Zogwirizana: Ndimuwuze Mnzanga Kuti Mwamuna Wake Amamunyengerera?
