Kodi Kuwala kwa Gasi N'chiyani?
Ngakhale zitha kutenga mitundu yosiyanasiyana, pachimake, kuyatsa gasi ndi njira yolankhulirana yomwe wina amakupangitsani kukayikira zomwe zidachitika m'mbuyomu. Nthawi zambiri, zimapangidwira kuti mumve ngati mukutaya mphamvu zanu zenizeni. M'mawonekedwe ake ocheperako, kuyatsa kwa gasi kumapangitsa kuti pakhale mphamvu yosafanana muubwenzi ndipo poyipa kwambiri, kuyatsa gasi kumatha kuonedwa ngati njira yowongolera malingaliro komanso kuzunza m'maganizo.
Mawuwa adachokera ku 1938 mystery thriller, Kuwala kwa Gasi, yolembedwa ndi wolemba sewero waku Britain Patrick Hamilton. Pambuyo pake seweroli linapangidwa kukhala filimu yotchuka kwambiri ndi Ingrid Bergman ndi Charles Boyer. Mufilimuyi, mwamuna Gregory amasokoneza mkazi wake wokonda Paula kuti akhulupirire kuti sangathenso kudalira maganizo ake enieni.
Malinga ndi Nambala Yambiri Yokhudza Nkhanza Zapakhomo , pali njira zisanu zoyatsira gasi:
- Nthawi zonse mumadziganizira nokha.
- Mumadzifunsa kuti, 'Kodi ndine wovuta kwambiri?' kakhumi ndi kawiri patsiku.
- Nthawi zambiri mumasokonezeka komanso kupenga.
- Nthawi zonse mumapepesa kwa amayi, abambo, mnzanu, bwana.
- Simungamvetsetse chifukwa chake, ndi zinthu zambiri zowoneka bwino m'moyo wanu, simuli osangalala.
- Nthawi zambiri mumapereka zifukwa zodzikhululukira zomwe mnzanuyo amachita kwa anzanu ndi abale.
- Mumapeza kuti simunamve zambiri kwa anzanu ndi achibale, kotero simusowa kufotokoza kapena kupereka zifukwa.
- Mukudziwa kuti china chake chalakwika kwambiri, koma simungathe kufotokoza chomwe chiri, ngakhale kwa inu nokha.
- Mumayamba kunama kuti mupewe zolakwika ndi zolakwika.
- Mumavutika kupanga zisankho zosavuta.
- Mumaona kuti poyamba munali munthu wosiyana kwambiri, wodzidalira, wokonda zosangalatsa, womasuka.
- Umakhala wopanda chiyembekezo komanso wopanda chimwemwe.
- Mumaona ngati simungathe kuchita bwino.
- Mukudabwa ngati ndinu 'wabwino mokwanira' bwenzi/mkazi/wantchito/bwenzi/mwana wamkazi.
Kodi Zina Zizindikiro Zotani Zomwe Mnzanu Akuchitirani Gasi?
Monga katswiri wa zamaganizo ndi wolemba Robin Stern, Ph.D. amalemba mu Psychology Today , pali zambiri zochenjeza kuti izi zikuchitika muubwenzi wanu. Izi zikuphatikizapo:
Kodi Mungadziwe Bwanji Kuyatsa Gasi Muubwenzi?
Chizindikiro chimodzi choyambirira chosonyeza kuti ubale ukhoza kulunjika ku kuyatsa kwa gas ndi kuchitika kwa bomba lachikondi - ndipo zitha kuwoneka ngati zofanana ndi nthawi yaukwati. Mukudziwa, komwe sungaleke kuyimba foni ndikuganizirana wina ndi mnzake, mumayamba kulota za tsogolo limodzi ndipo pomwe nthawi zambiri mumakhala onyoza, mumapeza kuti mukulemba. ndakatulo kwa nthawi yoyamba m'moyo wanu. Koma kuphulitsa kwachikondi ndi kosiyana—makamaka chifukwa ndi mbali imodzi ndipo kumamveka ngati kunjenjemera. Ndi maluwa operekedwa kuntchito ndi mitima yomwe ili m'dzina lanu, mlangizi ndi pulofesa Suzanne Degges-White, Ph.D amapereka monga chitsanzo chimodzi. Ndi malemba omwe amachulukirachulukira pamene akuwonjezeka mu chikondi. Ndi mawonekedwe odabwitsa omwe amapangidwira kuti akupangitseni kuti mukhale ndi nthawi yambiri ndi wophulitsa bombayo, osati mwangozi, nthawi yochepa ndi ena, kapena nokha. Ngati mwadzidziwitsidwa ndi kukhudzidwa kwadzidzidzi kwa manja achikondi, mwachidziwikire, mukuphulitsidwa ndi chikondi.
M'buku lophunzirira Psychology ndi chiyani?: Social Psychology , Hal Belch akusonyeza kuti kuphulitsa mabomba kwachikondi ndi njira imene atsogoleri achipembedzo amagwiritsira ntchito: Pofuna kukopa anthu omwe angakhale mamembala awo, ampatuko amagwiritsa ntchito njira zosiyanasiyana zodzipezera ulemu zomwe zimatchedwa 'Kuwombera Mabomba Achikondi,' momwe amasambitsira olembedwa ndi chikondi ndi chitamando chosalekeza. Ndilonso njira yodziwika bwino yomwe ochita zachiwerewere amagwiritsa ntchito kuti azitha kulamulira, malinga ndi bukuli Magulu ndi Atsikana .
Kuwombera kwachikondi ndikothandiza chifukwa kumapangitsa chinyengo kuti wophulitsa wachikondi ali pachiwopsezo ndi inu. Izi zimakupangitsani kuti muwatsegulire zambiri kuposa momwe mungasangalalire, ndikusiya chitseko chili chotseguka kuti chichitidwe ndikuwongolera.
Kodi Mungachite Chiyani Ngati Mukukhudzidwa ndi Gasi?
Pangani Umboni
Chifukwa chakuti cholinga chachikulu cha kuunikira kwa gasi ndikukupangitsani kumva ngati simunagwirizane ndi zenizeni, ndikofunika kusunga mbiri ya zinthu zomwe zikuchitika, kuti mubwerere ngati umboni pamene mukuyamba kukayikira kukumbukira kwanu. Pankhani ya umboni, a Nambala Yambiri Yokhudza Nkhanza Zapakhomo imalimbikitsa kusunga nyuzipepala yokhala ndi madeti, nthawi ndi zinthu zambiri monga momwe kungathekere, kuwonjezera pa kuuza wachibale kapena mnzanu wodalirika.
Dalirani Anzanu ndi Banja Lanu
Ngakhale nthawi zambiri cholinga cha woyatsira gasi kukupatulani kwa anthu omwe amakukondani, kukhala ndi anthu ena omwe si okondedwa anu omwe mungawauze zakukhosi ndikofunikira ngati kuli kotheka. Kuphatikiza pakuchita ngati bolodi, bwenzi kapena wachibale ndi munthu wachitatu wopanda tsankho yemwe angayang'ane zomwe zikuchitika ndikukukumbutsani kuti zomwe mukumva sizopenga kapena kukokomeza.
Pezani Thandizo la Akatswiri
Ngati mukukayikira kuti paubwenzi wanu pali kuwombana kwa gasi, funsani thandizo kwa dokotala yemwe ali ndi chiphatso—makamaka munthu amene amadziŵa bwino za chithandizo chaubwenzi—amene angakuthandizeni kufotokoza zimene mukukumana nazo ndi kukuthandizani kuti mudutse. Kutengera kuuma kwa vuto lanu, mutha kuyimbiranso National Abuse Hotline pa 800-799-7233 kuti muthandizidwe mwachangu.
Ndi Zizindikiro Zina Zotani Zomwe Muli Paubwenzi Wapoizoni?
1. Mumada Nkhawa Pamene Simuli Pamodzi
Mukakhala maola angapo kutali ndi mnzanuyo, mumadzipeza nokha kuyang'ana foni yanu, kukhala ndi vuto lopanga zisankho nokha ndikudandaula kuti chinachake chidzalakwika. Ngakhale poyamba munaganiza kuti ichi ndi chifukwa inu ayenera khalani limodzi (chilichonse chimayenda bwino mukakhala nonse awiri, kukumbatirana pakama), sizili choncho, akutero. Jill P. Weber, Ph.D. Ngati mumadzikayikira nokha, zikhoza kukhala chizindikiro chakuti mnzanuyo ali ndi moyo pa moyo wanu-ndi zisankho zomwe mumapanga-m'njira yoopsa.
2. Simumadziona ngati Inuyo
Ubale wabwino uyenera kutulutsa zabwino kwambiri mwa inu. Pamene inu ndi mnzanuyo mukupita kovina, muyenera kudzimva ngati ndinu odzidalira, okongola komanso osasamala, osachita nsanje, osatetezeka kapena osanyalanyazidwa. Ngati mwamva choipitsitsa Popeza mwakhala mukucheza ndi anzanu ofunikira, pakhoza kukhala zinthu zoopsa zomwe zikuchitika.
3. Mukupereka Njira Zochuluka Kuposa Zomwe Mukuchita
Sitikutanthauza zinthu zakuthupi ndi manja akuluakulu, monga maluwa ndi truffles. Zimakhudzanso tinthu tating'ono tating'ono, monga kusisita msana popanda kufunsidwa, kutenga nthawi yofunsa za tsiku lanu kapena kukatenga ayisikilimu omwe mumakonda ku golosale-chifukwa choti. Ngati ndinu nokha amene mukuchita zinthu zapaderazi kwa wokondedwa wanu ndipo sakubwezerani kapena kubwezera chizindikiro (makamaka ngati mwalankhulana kale kuti izi ndi zomwe mukufuna), ingakhale nthawi. kuti awonetsetse ubalewo.
4. Inu ndi Wokondedwa Wanu Sungani Zigoli
Chochitika cha ‘kusunga zigoli’ ndi pamene wina amene muli pachibwenzi akupitiriza kukuimbani mlandu chifukwa cha zolakwa zomwe munapanga m’mbuyomu, akufotokoza motero. Mark Manson , wolemba wa Zojambula Zobisika Zosapereka F * ck . Mukathetsa vuto, ndi chizoloŵezi choopsa kwambiri kuti muvumbulutse mkangano womwewo mobwerezabwereza, ndi cholinga chokweza mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu kumodzi (kapena kuchititsa manyazi). Mwachitsanzo, tiyerekeze kuti mudatuluka ndi anzanu chilimwe chatha, muli ndi ma Aperol spritzes atatu ndipo mwangozi munathyola nyali. Ngati munalankhulapo kale ndikupepesa, palibe chifukwa choti mnzanuyo azibweretsa nthawi zonse pamene inu ndi anzanu muli ndi tsiku lakumwa zakumwa.
ZOKHUDZANA : Zizindikiro 5 Kuti Ubale Wanu Ndi Wolimba
